Archive for December, 2016

Coming in 2017: The Death Channel

Friday, December 30th, 2016

With all the focus on famous deaths in 2016, here is a programming line-up for The Death Channel.*

7:00am – The Dirge: Who died yesterday and why you should care.

8:00am – Miss Diagnosis: Death Channel’s original hospital-based, comedic soap opera featuring a young doctor’s life, relationships and consequences as she often treats the disease and kills the patient.

9:00am – Not Dead Yet: Documentary interviews of old or sick celebrities you may have forgotten about, but are amazingly still alive…for now.

10:00am – Reapers: After the funeral, these treasure hunters go through celebrity estates and attempt to buy unique and collectible items from the heirs. Will they make the deal and make a profit?

11:00am – Great Deaths in History: Will your death be this amazing? Not likely. The most amazing, record setting and impacting deaths in modern history (now in color).

Noon – Mortal Meme: The latest online buzz on dead celebrities and dark humor.

1:00pm - At The Buzzer: Highlights from the careers of famous, recently dead athletes.

2:00pm – Death’s Door: America’s most popular cemetery tour show takes you to St. Louis #1 in New Orleans and Christ Church in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

3:00pm – Ash to Ash: the Ash Brothers show you DIY coffins and going green with embalming.

4:00pm - Death Watch: Whose death will we be discussing in coming weeks or months? The latest on celebrity disease and addiction so you’ll be prepared to mourn. Get your recommendations of the day for songs to listen to, movies to watch and books to read so you’ll be properly prepared to grieve a celebrity’s passing.

5:00pm – The Bereaved: A Hindu Pandit, Christian Priest and Atheist Scientist bring on guests to debate “where are they now.” Today’s episode: the panel concludes a famous singer is likely in purgatory and suspect a certain movie star has been reincarnated as an ugly starfish. See the starfish!

6:00pm – Pale White Horses: Dead Celebrities’ Pets – This week’s episode looks at a cat that inherited a Hollywood estate and a famous author’s dog, missing and a suspect in his owner’s demise.

7:00pm – Stygian Shores: In this episode of the award winning death travel show, see the best Caribbean islands to die on.

8:00pm – Dead Today: Live programming recapping who died today.

9:00pm – Re-Autopsy: Conspiracy and murder in the great mysterious deaths of history featuring experts on the mafia, intelligence agencies and aliens.

10:00pm – Swan Song: The best songs of musicians who died in the last month.

11:00pm – Dreamless Sleep: Live programming from inside a celebrity coffin in this eight-hour broadcast of silent darkness.

*The Death Channel replaces the Scary Clown Channel on your local television provider.

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